1000 Seconds

  1. It’s a simple game.
    Just hold this
    button down:
  2. Oh, it’s you again.
  3. We really must stop
    meeting like this.
  4. It’s not me, it’s you.
  5. Whatevs.
  6. Why are you still here?!
  7. That’s it...
  8. You’re doing really well.
    Great button holding.
  9. Don’t think about giving up, there’s so much to look forward to.
  10. We have such sights
    to show you!
  11. Like kittens.
  12. But first, let’s put
    on some music.
  13. If you can’t hear it,
    just imagine something
    really... smooth.
  14. Auto mode now engaged.
    You can let go.
  15. Sorry, I lied about
    auto mode.
  16. (I’m not sorry)
  17. I feel our relationship
    got off to a bad start.
  18. Can I make it up to you?
  19. With more kittens..?
  20. Are we friends now?
  21. It’s time we made
    it official:
  22. UsVsTh3m accepts no liability for any loss, damage or injury caused by the use or misuse of this game. By holding down the button you accept this contract.
  23. No user-serviceable parts inside, refer servicing to qualified service personnel. Your home may be at risk if you do not keep up payments on a mortgage or leave the cooker on when you go out.
  24. Let’s see what’s on telly...
  25. See if sticking your arm
    out improves the reception.
  26. Oh well.
    We’ll just have to chat.
  27. Or play a game.
  28. I Spy, with my little eye,
    something beginning with...
  29. B
  30. No, it’s not ‘button’.
  31. It’s not ‘browser’ either.
  32. Or ‘bright orange’.
  33. You’re rubbish at this game.
  34. To be honest, you’ve taken
    so long I’ve forgotten.
  35. After all we’ve already been through, this all seems far too formal.
  36. This is much more relaxed.
    Now we can ‘chill out’.
  37. It’s such a friendly-looking font, I use it for everything.
  38. You don’t like it?
  39. No, it’s fine.
    I’m not offended.
  40. You know what I’ll bet you really love?
  41. Spiders.
  42. He’s a little cutey.
  43. Are your eyes
    getting tired?
  44. The orange might start fading, or focus could weaken.
  45. If that happens, try blinking a bit more.
  46. Look out of a window every now and then.
  47. Roll your eyes, like you’re on the phone to your parents.
  48. Better?
  49. Now to exercise
    that finger.
  50. Wiggle it to the left...
  51. Now shake it to the right...
  52. Now wave your fingers
    in the air like you
    just don’t care.
  53. I wasn’t trying to trick you.
    We’re past all that.
  54. Have you ever tried hypnosis?
  55. No reason, just curious.
  56. You are feeling very sleepy.
  57. When you hear the word ‘drumstick’, you will act like a chicken.
  58. You will wake up when I count to three.
  59. One...
    You’re starting to awaken.
  60. Two...
    You can open your eyes.
  61. Three.
  62. Where were we?
  63. Oh yes, we were discussing our favourite musical implements.
  64. Mine is the drumstick.
  65. Drumstick.
    Drum. Stick.
  66. I think I need a wee.
  67. I always need the toilet when waiting for things.
  68. Hang on, I won’t be long.
  69. While you’ve been pressing that button, I’ve been looking at your files.
  70. I found some photos.
  71. That’s you, that is.
  72. On a good day.
  73. That’s your house.
  74. After you decorated it.
  75. I feel that this experience
    has brought us closer.
  76. You know what I’m
    talking about.
  77. A bond between strangers,
    forged by button pressing.
  78. It doesn’t have to end.
  79. You can keep pressing.
  80. Forever.
  81. And ever.
  82. Don’t let go...

  83. Don’t...

  84. ...

Press for 1000.000 seconds Score:0000000

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